Ode to an old friend

Dear Black and Decker Pop n' Serve Popcorn Poppery,

We've been together for so many years I'm sure you're probably feeling taken for granted at this point, aren't you? Well, I was just discussing you with my good friend last night and I realized that you have been the one constant in my life for the last 27 years. Damn I'm old. Nothing else in my life has lasted as long as you so that's gotta mean something to you, doesn't it?

You went with me to college as a gift from my aunt Esther when I was a frightened teenager unsure of what to expect. I remember thinking to myself that you were a cheap gift and quite frankly I wasn't impressed with you. Boy did I have a lot to learn. You kept me company throughout all of those dateless nights in my dorm room. You made it into everyplace I've ever lived since I left the comfort of my mothers house. You met every room mate I've ever had. You stood bye silently and never judged me while peacefully observing every loser man I've ever seriously dated. You got me through weight watchers as I lost 89 pounds all those years ago and you continued to be there for me as I gave up those fattening chips that put some of that weight back on me. You were right next to me and my hot cocoa mug during blizzards, and you were there again in the heat of the summer when I couldn't really eat and just wanted something fun to nibble on.

What can I say to you? A cheap gift? Wow, I'm embarrassed to admit that I ever felt anything other than deep affection and dare I say "love" for you. After browsing through some of your distant relatives on Amazon recently, I can honestly say that they broke the mold when they made you. Your design and performance has never been matched since, not even by that snotty Cuisinart.

So tonight, I'm going to pull you out and show you how much you mean to me. I only hope and pray that you have another 25 years left in you my friend ,or that I go before you cuz I don't want to live in a world without my beloved pop n'serve popper.The thought of that is simply too much to bear.

That's all for now :)